Reclaiming Our Narratives: Stereotypical "Bants" About Black Women

The sincerity in Ryan Clark's breakdown of why it's not cool for Black women to be the continued source of stereotypical jokes resonates deeply. His call to stop reducing Black women to unfair and harmful caricatures transcends borders, finding relevance here in the UK as much as in the U.S. When Clark posed whether the Black experience in the U.S. mirrors that of the UK, the answer is clear: absolutely. While contexts differ, the microaggressions, dismissals, and stereotypical "banter" remain eerily similar across both sides of the Atlantic.

This issue came into sharp focus when James Duncan and Fuhad Dawodu, Black British hosts of the ShxtsNGigs podcast, found themselves in hot water after laughing along to disparaging remarks about Black women made by comedian Andrew Schulz. Phrases like:

  • "She’s too hard."

  • "She’s difficult."

  • "She’s too much work."

  • "She’s headstrong."

  • "She’s intimidating."

  • "She’s angry."

These are not just words. They are weapons wielded to belittle and silence Black women, diminishing our worth and value. For many Black women, including myself, these words echo a lifetime of experience.

When Did “Too Much” Become a Bad Thing?

Growing up, I often heard I was “too much” or “too strong.” But when I think of the woman who raised me, I see that being “too much” was never a flaw. It was a shield.

My mother worked 2–3 jobs a day to provide for our family. She was strict, no-nonsense, and didn’t take any mess, so much so that even my friends were a little afraid of her. But behind that tough exterior was a woman determined to ensure her children succeeded in a world intent on tearing them down. Her intense love, her devotion to family, and her refusal to compromise on our well-being are qualities that helped me grow and thrive.

These are the traits that society tells us are “too much” when applied to Black women. But these are the same traits that allowed generations of Black women to survive and push through. When I was asked in interviews early in my career what motivated me, my answer was always the same: my mother.

Reclaiming Our Narratives

This year's Black History Month theme of "Reclaiming Our Narratives" reminds us that the stories others tell about us are not the ones we need to accept. The media and society have often portrayed Black women through harmful stereotypes—angry, difficult, intimidating. These narratives rob us of our complexity, our humanity, and our power. But reclaiming our narrative means refusing to let others define us.

What Schulz, and sadly Duncan and Dawodu, failed to recognise is that these jokes aren’t harmless. They are part of a larger pattern that strips Black women of their dignity. It’s not just about jokes—it’s about reinforcing stereotypes that justify the ways Black women are treated in the workplace, in healthcare, in education, and in society at large. These "bants" contribute to systemic inequalities that make it harder for Black women to thrive.

A Call for Allyship

Ryan Clark’s stand against these damaging stereotypes is a powerful example of allyship. As a Black man, his voice carries weight, and his willingness to challenge the status quo is crucial. True allyship means not being complicit in the harmful narratives society perpetuates. It means calling out microaggressions and standing with Black women, not just in private, but in public spaces where these harmful ideas are most often spread.

The time has come for all of us—especially Black men—to stop laughing at the expense of Black women and start standing beside them. Because when you reduce Black women to "banter," you’re not just mocking individuals. You’re mocking our mothers, our sisters, our daughters—our very essence.

Let’s Do Better Together

Black women deserve better. It’s time we reclaimed our stories, our worth, and our strength. Let’s shift the narrative and refuse to allow these damaging stereotypes to persist.

If you’re ready to stand with black women or if you’re navigating adversity in your workplace due to your intersecting identities, reach out to us for a free discovery call: https://calendly.com/grace-mosuro/introductory-call-1.

Together, we can create more inclusive spaces where everyone’s narrative is respected.

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